Saturday, January 21, 2012

Choosing to be Pro-Life



About 10 years ago, a young woman became pregnant. She sought the advice from a man she respected in the church. She was considering not going through with the pregnancy, due to the circumstances of how she became with child. The pastor suggested she go speak to a woman at a Pregnancy Crisis Center. There are many of these across the country- offering free advice, services and support for women with unplanned pregnancies. Some are even able to show the woman the baby's heartbeat- showing that there is a living, beating being in their womb.


That woman decided to keep her child. And through 2 more unexpected pregnancies- she decided to choose life again.


What happened over the next few years is not pleasant, there were a lot of mistakes made, a lot of ups and downs- certainly not the easiest life for the family of 4.


What if that woman would have chosen to "terminate" ---ahhh i hate that word--- the pregnancies? What if she would have not chosen life?


I can write this blog with full confidence that if those choices were different, we would not have our 3 vibrant, unique and crazy children. We would not have our special family. The world would be deprived of 3 AMAZING creations. It's almost hard to type without getting a deep sorrow considering the alternative outcome.


Now life has not been all princesses and butterflies because of these choices... certainly not for the biological mother, the kids, or the newlywed couple thrown into parenthood.


But 3 children have LIFE and have the opportunity to know life ABUNDANTLY through Christ because of the decision made 10 years ago.


We are eternally grateful to the mom that chose life, the pastor who advised her, and the woman at the pregnancy center.


Watch out world, because these 3 little lives are going to move and shake this place! The world would NOT be the same without them in it.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Unexpected Feedback...

One thing I did not expect when we decided to take the foster-adopt journey was how many people (who have never taken this journey) have felt compelled to tell me specifically what my kid's problem behaviors are, why they probably act like they do, how we should be handling them, etc.

The first thing that always comes to my mind is self doubt on my parenting- I feel like everyone sees these things and thinks our family is out of control! I feel like I am not doing a good job. I feel like giving up.

Then I start to think of how that person is not in my shoes. They most likely have had natural kids and have had time to nurture their child, hone their parenting skills and bring them up accordingly. They are not having therapists come in twice a month to meet with their children and give them evidenced based, credible parenting advice for children like ours.

They most likely are expecting our children to behave like theirs.

And that is just not going to happen! At least no time soon. Brad and I were just talking the other day about how it has been 6 months since the kids moved in. We have seen SO much progress with the kids....yet we still have so many worries and concerns for things they are still processing and adjusting to. Then there is us- We are still adjusting and processing!!! I feel like the recovery mentality of "one day at a time" is our motto! There have been so many times when I know I have not made the best decisions in handling things.

To our advantage, we serve a GREAT God who gives us his GRACE to cover all of the areas that we fail in. So thankful for that!! We truly are a work in progress, just like every other family out there.... so please- go easy on us! I promise I will never tell you how to parent your child- unless you are on my caseload and I am being paid to do it!

Tuesday, January 3, 2012

We bought a Zoo

We started a new family tradition on New Years Day. (blogs on our first Christmas together and Christmas break to come...)


We went to the movies! Growing up, we had family movie day sometimes on Christmas night or on Thanksgiving night and I remember it always being the BEST because my dad would splurge for the popcorn, special topping, pop, candy and all! I knew this would be special for our kids because the few times we have gone to the movies I have been "that mom" that packs the snacks and waters. I know- LAME MOM!


Anyways, we decided on We Bought a Zoo because it looked like it was going to be good for Brad and I and the kids LOVE the zoo and love animals.


So as we are sitting through the movie, I begin to realize- this is a metaphor for our life! We bought a zoo! We did something crazy when the world was saying no. We took on a challenge that not everyone was excited about, and was not easy- sometimes the hardest at times. We took on a challenge that will require constant learning, adapting, adjusting and passion. We bought a zoo!


My favorite quote from the movie was:


All it takes is 20 seconds of insane courage and great things will happen!


This reminds me of when I made the call to CYS to tell them that, yes, we will adopt the kids. I remember it was such a short phone call and at the end.... it didn't feel real or official yet... but my call had made me a mom.


Our zoo for sure is crazy, broken, fun, silly, tiring, frustrating, loving... but it is our zoo... and we wouldn't change a thing!